Oath of 2007 (even though 1/6^th has been completed)

·       One must not carry out acts of revenge in the victim’s presence or ‘nearby-ness’

·       One must not make (sarcastic) jokes that may even slightly hurt another

·       One must not feel hurt if she is the last to be picked as a partner at dance

·       One must look on the positive side of being single

·       One must show future kids this oath

·       One must have future kids. If the step directly after meiosis is not suitable, one must adopt or kidnap.

·       One must present others with gifts and tokens of love on special occasions that they/everybody own(s)

·       One’s warts must not restrict her from the daily and not-so-daily joys of life

·       One must be patient with her parents when they are out-of-tune with the laws of the new generation

·       One must be patient with her own generation when they are disappointingly out-of-tune with the laws of the new generation 

·       One must screw first impressions and get to know others

·       One must replace colourful vocabulary with suitable sounds according to the word being taken care of

·      One must not be shy about her morals around the other species

·       One must wear sunscreen with an SPF of at least 45 to ensure that one does not develop premature wrinkles

·       One must resist the urge to feed off others’ defeat in games such as minesweeper 

·       One must not pinch fat when dancing around naked in front of the mirror

·       One must respect others’ property and bring one’s own to suitable occasions

·      One must not exclude, ditch or discriminate another; no matter how ear-shattering, eye-damaging or infectious they are

·       One must deal with living above her brother and respect his wishes of {quote} not moving around like an elephant {quote}, even if he doesn’t respect one’s wish of not having music up too high. It is too high when one can lie on the floor and receive and instant massage

·       One must not forget old friends, or new ones, for that matter

·       One must obey this oath

·       One must allow for this oath to grow in order for one to become a better person